THE STINKING THINGS UP

When you think about it it's kind of strange that the perfume and aftershave manufacturers aren't more adventurous with the scents. There's a lot of musk, a lot of animal magnetism, plenty of marking your territory. There's not a lot of bacon, so far as I can see.

Come on, everyone loves the smell of bacon. Even Jewish vegetarians love the smell of bacon. It's a happy smell. You're out with a friend who smells of bacon, you're happy, the people around you are happy - everyone wins.

Wouldn't coffee be a good smell for aftershave? It has a nice pep-you-up kind of feel about it. Coffee and shaving are the two essentials in a man's morning ritual. Without those the day just hasn’t begun.

What about chocolate? Wouldn't that be the ideal first date scent? I mean, what woman can resist chocolate?

You put those three smells up against Chanel #5 and I think you know which scents are going to win out.