Wednesday, March 05, 2008

THE JUST HAVING ANOTHER HEART ATTACK

I'm getting a little sick of all these lists of things that I have to do before I die. You know the things I mean. Fifty places you just have to visit before you die. Fifty albums you have to listen to before you die. Fifty hilarious things you have to say to a waiter... before you die.

I mean, really? Before I die, you say? Before? I can't leave it until afterwards? Maybe just listen to twenty CDs from your important list now and catch up with the others in the afterlife?

Because, come on people, everything you have to do, everything you're going to do - it's all got to be before you die. There's not much happening afterwards. There's no critical CDs you have to listen to after you die. Really, there just isn't. And it's not only morbid, it's nonsensical. No one's writing lists of albums you have to listen to after you've been born. We just call that "listening to albums".

And, look - once you die there's just a couple of hymns and a nice suit you have to wear, really. That's all the things left on the to-do list.

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