I JUST HAD ANOTHER HEART ATTACK

Getting the facts from News television is like getting information from an excitable six year old. Everything has a heightened sense of urgency when you tune in, no matter how inconsequential. It's all live, it's NOW, it's important.

They've got a reporter on the street, at the scene of whatever it was that happened before you switched on, and he's breathless, he's looking over his shoulder all the time, afraid he'll miss a new development. Things are moving quick - the guy in the studio doesn't know what he's asking, he just knows it's 24 hour news, it's urgent, and it is vitally important.

"A man here dropped his wallet earlier today, on this very street I'm standing on now. You can see the street behind me."

"And when exactly did this happen, do we know?"

"It was - literally - 30 minutes ago."

"And what do we know about the man in question?"

"Details are sketchy at this stage, but I've spoken to some of the local residents here who say they saw him, he was male, and he was wearing clothing."

"And what about the wallet?"

"We've had unconfirmed reports that it contained almost £30 sterling."

No matter what the subject is, no matter how long it's been dragging on, how much time has passed since the actual occurrence, it's all still delivered in that frantic manner. Yesterday's sports results are urgent on the 24 hour rolling news station. Tomorrow's weather is a crisis on news TV.

But, in case we didn't know how urgent it all is, they like to add that "Live" caption wherever they can, maybe a rotating "Breaking news" sign, and the constant stream of banner headlines across the bottom. Just like that six year old explaining a fight to his teacher - it's all pow, wham, so much happening, words can't come out fast enough.