MORE OLYMPIC FUN AND GAMES

What is this obsession with the beach volleyball? Volleyball, I get. People volley, there's a ball. But does there have to be a beach now?

Apparently, the 2012 London Olympics plan to have the beach volleyball played on Horseguard's Parade. So, what - they're going to move the ocean all the way to the centre of London for this now? Because, I'm sorry, just having some sand there doesn't really count as beach volleyball. That's just "on some sand volleyball". The only way to have beach volleyball is to have a beach.

Do you think that maybe London secured the 2012 Olympics on the basis that an organised company appeared to be behind the whole bid? The Olympic Committee were looking at the bids and they saw, y'know, New York... City of, sure, whatever. Moscow, great, Russian, yada-yada. But London - London had that "Sebastian Co." organising the whole thing. That had to be worth trying. Of course, they almost went with Paris, but realised that she'd had enough media exposure.