ADVANCED CUTLERY

Once you've used the pizza wheel, it's hard to go back to the regular knife to cut stuff up. It's like eating with chopsticks after you've seen a spoon - you can do it, but you can't shake the thought that there's an easier way you're just ignoring.

All the pizza wheel is is a blade on an axle with a handle attached. It's so simple. But, put those three things together and you have a knife that goes on cutting forever. If you wanted to carve the Earth into portions for, say, visiting titans, you'd use a pizza wheel. It never runs out.

The universe is ever-expanding - the pizza wheel could still cut it into slices.

But you still go back to the regular knife, at the end of the day. It's got, like, a three inch blade, no moving parts - it's like we're living in the Dark Ages here. I figure, if we could phase in the pizza wheel as its replacement we'd see a drop in knife crime. It's pretty tough to stab someone with a wheel. That's one of the laws of geometry, I think.