THE IMPASSE

And there's nothing else quite like the sinking feeling you get in your stomach when your pass stops working. You're standing at the ticket barriers, there's a big queue of people behind you and - beep-beep-beep - "seek assistance". Because you feel like a criminal.

You get very apologetic in that situation. You do that "I don't understand how this can have happened" face to the person behind you. And you have to try the pass a couple more times to really be sure.

Sometimes you see people, they will keep sliding that pass along no matter how many "seek assistance" signs flash up. Doesn't matter how many people are waiting behind them. Doesn't matter how many staff are eager and willing to help. The train station could be on fire and they'd still be there, swiping the travelcard, seeking no assistance whatsoever. I think their attitude is "I've been navigating gates since I was 18 months old, thank you very much. I'll tell you when I need assistance."

The thing about the seek assistance sign is it has no real power to make you seek that assistance. It's just a prompt, and a lot of people don't like to get prompted into taking action. What they really need at the station is a guy who comes out when your pass doesn't work, grabs you by the shoulder and tells you, "We'd like you to come with us. You're playing with colonial dollars there, son."